


Cannon Craze

by demonfire57



Category: Cuphead (Video Game)
Genre: Tumblr request, cannon fire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 11:58:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15863169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonfire57/pseuds/demonfire57
Summary: In which Sally Stageplay and Beppi the Clown pull off the greatest Act Inkwell Isle had ever seen.





	Cannon Craze

**Author's Note:**

> A new Cuphead fanfiction.  
> I received a request by someone who wishes to remain anonymous and the two of us discussed a story about Sally Stageplay being shot out of a cannon.  
> This was pretty funny to write and I hope you all think the same!
> 
> As always, Comments and Kudos welcomed. If you have a request, dm me and we can discuss it.

The sun shone down, created strange colored shadows through the multicolored tent flaps that billowed open as the Inkwell Isle residents traveled in and out of them among the fair grounds. It was a day of celebration, as it marked five years since Cuphead and his brother, Mugman, had freed all the souls of their contracts that the Devil had gone after. Fear of the Devil and his lackeys still ran through the Isle, but it was only because the Casino still stood as a reminder of what had transpired.

In one of the many tents, a tall petite woman was climbing into a rather large cannon. She wore a large pink and blue striped tutu with pink ballet shoes and a white polka-dotted dress shirt. She held a pink umbrella in one hand and an overly-large cigar in the other while her unruly curly blonde hair was piled on her head into three separate sections, all held in place by three overly large blue striped bows.

“Darlin’,” her husband asked as she situated herself in the cannon, “Are ya sure ya wanna do this? I git that the clown is friend an’ all…”

“Oh, come on, sweetie,” the woman grinned wickedly, her head already decided, “It won’t be that bad. Besides, Beppi won’t let anything happen to me.”

“It’s not the clown I’m worried ‘bout, Sally…”

Sally Stageplay knew what exactly what he was thinking. What in the world made the two of them decide on this trick? It was only the craziness that lived in everyone on the isle that this idea could be from.

It started out as a simple trick, as Beppi the Clown wanted to know how to tight rope walk and had asked Sally, who had had her fair share of similar experiences, to help him out. As the two began to practice, they added more and more to their routine before the cannon came into play.

When Sally mentioned about being shot out of a cannon for the fun of it, Beppi tried to dissuade her, fearfully of what would happen and nervous about how her husband, Mr. Stageplay, would feel about it. However, Sally, ever so stubborn, requested they do the trick with a cannon. Otherwise, she wouldn’t help Beppi.

The clown reluctantly agreed only for her help, but had confined in Djimmi after the argument.

Sally knew that if Djimmi was Beppi’s confident, then there was no way for anything to go wrong. As far as the trick went, it was very simple.

Sally was to be shot straight upward before falling with her umbrella opened. She would then land on Beppi’s shoulders while the clown sat on a unicycle on a high tight rope, all the while he juggled.

Under both the clown’s and the genie’s persistence, the actress and the clown practiced the trick multiple times and had performed it to a t every time. Beppi had gained confidence and both were confident that they could perform it perfectly.

What could possibly go wrong?

***

“Ladies and gentlemen, children of Inkwell Isle… Prepare yourself for an unforgettable sight never before seen until now!”

The tent had been packed to the brim, with people standing outside to get a glimpse of everything that was about to transpire. Sally had seen Cuphead, Mugman, and Elder Kettle enter the tent to see the sight earlier. Djimmi was sitting next to them in the front row. Although he had seen the trick numerous times, he would always be there to support Beppi in his crazy anticts. As for her husband, Sally Stageplay had seen him take a seat on the far side of the tent, next to Hilda Berg, Goopy Le Grande, and Werner Werman.

“If I may direct your attention to the high tight rope that is above us now,” the announcer began, “For this trick, we will be shooting a lovely young lady out of this cannon. She will float back down ever so gently before landing on our famous clown, Beppi, who is above us now. If any of you aren’t sure, yes, he is on a unicycle and juggling.”

Everyone ohhed and ahhed as Beppi continued onward.

“Now, if you please-”

Sally stood up, cigar in mouth as the drums began. A nearby assistant lite the cigar as she took a puff before scramming.

Sally reached down ward and lit the fuse before setting back into position. However, as she was setting in, the axis of the cannon tilted ever so slightly, so it wasn’t straight as it was before. The announcer began shouting, but no one could hear what was being said.

Then, the cannon went off.

Fireworks exploded as everyone suddenly watched in pure horror as Sally Stageplay didn’t shoot up straight as needed, but sideways!

“There she goes!” someone shouted.

People began rushing to see where the girl would land.

“Oh, my poor love!” Mr. Stageplay wailed.

“Where is she going to land?”

“I don’t think that was supposed to happen…”

“Djimmi! Do something!”

The genie could only shrug as he watched on helplessly as Sally began to fade into the distance. Then, the water of the ocean began to bubble and the head of Cala Marie made it’s appearance. Everyone watched in sheer horror as the gorgon-mermaid rose out of the water, stretching.

As she yawned loudly, the small figure of Sally Stageplay landed inside the mermaid’s mouth before it shut. Cala swallowed, before suddenly gripping her throat as if she was choking.

Everyone waited and listened as the poor mermaid coughed long and hard before Sally made her appearance again, being shot out of Cala’s mouth and heading straight toward the tent again.

“Look out!”

“Here she comes!”

“Beppi! She’s coming!”

A very slime-covered Sally landed on Beppi’s shoulders. The hard impact on the poor clown’s shoulders caused him to drop his juggling balls and roll back and forth on the unicycle. The crowd watched, fear for what was going to the two.

Beppi, being a clown, was normally clumsy. However, he was able to straighten himself out as Sally gripped onto him tighter.

Once the two stilled, the crowd cheered and clapped. It wasn’t something they had expected, but it was a successful performance.

“Next time,” Beppi murmured, “We’re doing a simple magic trick.”

“If there is a next time,” Sally answered.


End file.
